I've been following his story from a few states away pretty much from the beginning, I feel like I kinda know him and his family personally, even though we have never even breathed the same air, in the same location, at the same time, let alone had a face to face, in person, conversation, it's the kids cancer thing, we are a club of our own, trust me, we NEVER issue an invitation to another soul, EVER, but, unfortunately, once your in, knocked out, dragged in and forced to unwillingly be a part of this club, you then have prime seats forever, upfront and center, in your face, take over your space, birds eye view, seats, forever, and when another member is thrown willy nilly into the club, it doesn't take but a few scans, pokes, prods, and vomit sessions until you are reliving every second of your own initiation into said club, and the first bleary, teary eyed scared to death, literally, cry for help and prayers from the lil heroes mum or daddy and you are fused at the heart for eternity, and what they're walking your gonna get all the feels, all the time, and the reliving and flash backs are on a never ending spin cycle! if you could, you would go to the ends of the earth to shield them from every facet of this green eyed ugly monster of a disease, you would dig a chasm a thousand miles wide so they would never be able to span it and have to face the ugly on the other side of sleepless weeks and terrors of, are we ever gonna be a whole family again? and what is normal? and what if they never get better? and what if they die? and why isn't treatment working? and what route of treatment should we take? and how can their little bodies take any more? and how do I get them to eat? and why aren't there answers and what's taking so long? and God are you who you say you are? and are you really here with us? and why my child? why mine?? we actually love and want our child and we are committed to death to raise and love them, why mine?? This, ALL OF THIS and so much more, is why one gets to feeling like they know them personally when you follow another families story, another hero kiddos valiant cancer battle efforts......It's been 13 years since we got the news that there is nothing more to be done for our 5 yr old Devin, got the news that the cancer was now in his bones and yet another massive tumor behind his lungs and that we should get hospice lined up and take him home and grab every second we can and love on him like crazy till Jesus says, come, it's over, you've soldiered on bravely, long enough. No parent ever wants this club, but, once in, you would move heaven and earth for your child, and no parent ever wants to hear, you've been thrown in this club, but now, your forever a part of it, but your going to have to say goodbye to your lil soldier and never get a pass outta the club, instead, you will remain in it, no one of your own to fight for any longer, but forever a front seat to the rest of the clubs continuing raging battle, so you collapse into your assigned seat, and wonder how you will ever make it to a year without your lil fighter, but, time doesn't stop for no one, and your numbly watching others walking in what once was your shoes and you know every step, and you feel every pain and emotion and then suddenly, 13 years later you realize as horrific as it all is, you wouldn't trade seats with anyone, this is your family, you get each other, you know what they are feeling and experiencing, and if you have to walk the pediatric cancer thing, you wouldn't want to be anywhere else but with those that understand it...….still, though, makes me want to shield EVERY SINGLE PARENT OUT THERE FROM HAVING TO BE THE NEXT ONE!! I want to scream, YOU ARE NOT INVITED, WE DON'T WANT YOU, THERE'S NOT ROOM FOR ANOTHER SOUL IN THIS CLUB!!!!!! At the same time, when I hear of another one being tossed our way, I want nothing more than to run with open arms, or grab the next flight or train or whatever and walk with them and help them carry this !!!
Lincoln Arrow Schrock, precious little chap, giving pediatric cancer every stinking bit of everything his little heart and soul and body has to throw at it, and all the while praising his creator, HIS GOD!!!!!! His faith is absolutely inspiring and so amazingly beautiful and that alone gives one tremendous hope and courage in the middle of the why's!! And I know his dear parents, Matt and Kaitlyn would pull on hip waders if needed and wade higher, and plunge deeper, if they knew there was more answers thrown their way and solutions given to beat this if they felt God directing that way, God knows, all of us parents that have sat by these littles sides, helpless and exhausted, at the end of our resources, would crawl yet one more mile across glass on bloodies hands and knees if it meant there was something that would fix this ugly disease! when you have a little cancer soldier hero in your midst that bravely battles on, we as the parents and their biggest fans and cheerleaders will go to the ends of the earth to squeeze into the trenches with them and shoulder them on...….but, sometimes, our fighting for them means letting them go...…..and this...….is where the fiercest battle of any of the treatment and disease hits......how does one let go, how do you give up all that you dreamed for them, for you as a family, how do you go on to make memories and moments without them in it, how do you live and breath and function ever again, how do you will your heart to keep beating knowing you will never be the same, how do you survive, what is survival...….seeing Lincoln's family start their goodbyes.....I almost wanted to stop following....but I couldn't, and I felt a bit like a coward, but......all the feels, the reliving, the numbness and suffocation and feeling like this was an outta body experience while trying to grasp reality, it all came back in sunami force......and then I though how in the world did we go from wondering how we would get passed a day, a week, a month, a year......to now being 13 years out??!!! and it hit me, MY GOD, LINCOLN'S GOD, that's how!! We never would be where we are without our faith and hope and the ever constant presence of OUR GOD, His faithfulness to us, carrying us on, walking with us, it by no means has been easy, but, without Him it would be hell!! And, the love and understanding of other club members, those that have a pair of moccasins just like ours, moccasins they were gifted at the time of initiation into the club.
Matt and Kaitlyn, you may never read this, and that's just fine, but know Lincoln's faith was well taught, he has it because he saw it soo well lived in his biggest fans and cheerleaders, his mum and daddy! He has given so many hope and courage and shared HIS GOD in a far more powerful and real way than most of us ever have, and has inspired us so beautifully to better in gifting OUR GOD to others. He has shown us, that miracles are precious and valuable and out there, we just have to search for them, and so often they are closer than we think and better than we imagined!! thank-you for sharing his preciousness with all of us, I know it wasn't always easy, and may have come with criticism and frustrations, but, I also know, his story and life have been the only Bible some have ever read!! I pray you feel immeasurable peace and comfort as you guide Lincoln into the arms of HIS GOD and that you will feel surrounded by an army of prayer warriors and children of God!! am so sorry you had to be thrown in our club, but, know, you don't walk alone!!
LIVE LIKE LINCOLN, KEEP YOUR ARROW POINTED TOWARDS HEAVEN AND YOUR GOD!!
