Cancer..............

December 21, 2018 Today was meet the breast surgeon day in Lancaster, Dr. Meyers. Glen took the day off to take me and was so glad to have him along to retain information and ask questions. He's a man of few words at times but thinks through stuff more thoroughly and patiently than I do and can keep his thoughts together much better. Dr. Meyers is a very sweet older lady but very open, forthright and kind. She said it is considered at this point until further testing gets done, INVASIVE DUCTUAL CARCINOMA STAGE 1. invasive not to mean panic, but meaning will take a more aggressive treatment, but very doable and curable. invasive meaning that it is the kind of cancer that will grow and spread and take over if it's given half a chance, but not necessarily that it has at this point. Her recommendation even as a breast surgeon is to do a chemo regimen they have found to have a very high success rate at shrinking and annihilating the cancer spots altogether, then reevaluating and if it's totally gone maybe only having to have a lumpectomy versus a total mastectomy, however she reaffirmed several times it is our decision what we would like to choose at treatment or the next step. she was very honest and up front about feeling treatment first would be her recommendation, and after listening to her we both felt comfortable in her being honest with us, I will admit that as not fun as having a mastectomy would be I went with my mind made up that this what we would do, have the surgery get rid of the evil disease move on with life, so it felt a bit like a letdown when she recommended otherwise, but that was just me wanting a quick fix to the nightmare we were in. My receptor test came back as a triple negative, normally it is 2 positives and a negative or 2 negatives and a positive. because of the triple negative and the cancer history in my family she highly encouraged the genetic test be done for further knowing how to best treat and also for the sake of my children and siblings so while we were there we went ahead and did that which consisted of a saliva test. it's amazing how little saliva one has and much work it takes to scrounge some up when one needs to fill a tube!  she said should we decide on chemo, she is saying we need to get a medi port put in, she warned that my hair will leave me and that after the chemo regimen and then whichever surgery us done, either lumpectomy or mastectomy, there would most likely be a preventative/booster round of  radiation also. there was so much to process and decide, we walked out feeling a bit overwhelmed yet relieved to have a lot of answers and info. we left there then went to the hospital for blood work then left for a bite to eat before returning to the hospital for an MRI to rule out any other cancer areas in either breast.
December 22, 2018 was glad for the company of my brother Mar and wife Rosene and little miss Isabella and the yummy sticky buns and breakfast rolls they brought over, was good to get our minds on other stuff even though we did talk about last few weeks events at length.
December 24, 2018 today the Dr. called to tell us the left side is cancer free and the right side the only thing they are seeing is one lymph node that has some blood flow to it, she said the oncologist would be able to tell me more about that later but doesn't feel it was anything to worry about and wanted me to know there's no cancer on left side and that my blood work is great before the Christmas holiday! that was a big relief and was so grateful for there thoughtfulness in that. as has been our tradition for quite a few years our besties Gary and Paula and miss Josie came and spent Christmas Eve with us. we laughed and cried and feasted on all manner of yummy dishes, then ended the evening with the same movie we giggle about every year, Trapped In Paradise. felt so good to at least pretend everything was a bit normal still.

Christmas Day 2018 today was spent with my family, lots of memories were made, felt like a long day and yet at the same time felt like we waited for Christmas so long then suddenly it was over.

December 26, 2018 felt like I could breath a sigh of relief and put the Holidays behind me somewhat and was ready to think about and gear up for getting the show on the road with decisions as to what we were gonna do about treatment plans and next step forward to get this behind us. we have been hearing from quite a few people with suggestions and tips and advice for ulternative treatment and other meds and devices and locations for help with this horrible disease. it's a lot of stuff to sort through and process and we are so very grateful to each one that has reached out and been willing to offer help, it means so much and I thank everyone that has and if we decide not to do something you have extended to us I pray you will not take any of it personal, we finally had to come to a decision and faith in that decision that this is what we feel we are to do for us in this situation, but we love everyone and their care for us, it all becomes so confusing and a bit overwhelming, we wish we could do a little bit of it all but don't feel that's wise either.

this whole process brings back a lot of memories of 14 years ago and being hit with all this when Devin was diagnosed. Glen has been my rock, but he is feeling it hard too. breaks my heart and leaves me feeling so helpless to watch a grown man dissolve in tears and yet to see his heart in all this and feel him being ok and open about it all is so precious. I thank God that if I have to walk this path he gave me a strong sweet man to walk it with me............

until next installment..........................